A little reflection...

So I'm sitting at home today with the stomach bug, and I can't help but think a little. OK, those of you know me me well will see right through that and find that my mind never really stops working or processing. I do my best to calculate my every move, which may seem to some folks as acting slowly. Everything with me has to possess a strategy and show to me a plan. It's hard for me to make leaps of faith, but I'm trying to get better with that.

A very good friend told me recently that you can't force things, and as hard as I try, there are just certain emotions and feelings that you cannot impress upon people. It's not that this is a new concept to me, but it's something that has inexplicably resonated with me the past few days. Remember, I try to plan all of my moves ahead of time and, to me, nothing is said or happens without reason.

If you feel like you don't have the energy to read a lot, please stop now. I give fair warning about the long-winded nature of this. People say that I don't really use my journalism degree any more, but this is an avenue where I can express an appreciation for something simple yet complex: words.

From a young age, I learned the importance of words and the power of silence. Sitting back, observing then surprising the people around me is my style and my comfort zone. That being said, most people that allow me to get close have realized that I can sometimes ramble and forget that whole "silence is golden" thing. There's really not that much middle ground, I guess.

Growing up, I used the tactic of letting my parents air out their frustrations and anger whenever I did something wrong. After the yelling and screaming, I would then state my case which usually led to reduced or no punishment whether I deserved it or not. I think I figured this out after inexcusably telling my mom to "shut up" once I realized something that all children eventually come to understand (I don't want to spoil the ending, but it involves the true identity of the guy in a red suit at Christmas). I lost my temper with them, something that rarely happened for the rest of my adolescence. Whenever I was really upset from then on, it was pretty much the silent treatment.

The phrase "the pen is mightier than the sword" has always been too cliche' for my liking. Sure, words are powerful and can affect the recipients' lives both positively or negatively depending on their tone and delivery, but it all depends on the person holding the pen and the person holding the sword. I've wrote and said things that have lifted people beyond the limits of the sky, and I've also destroyed confidences and hearts with the wrong words. It's not something I've ever been proud of, and I wish I could take those times back. Those times helped me to be better with words though, retrospectively. They've helped me to control something else that has always touched my life: passion.

Passion is one of those words that, when we are asked to define, we can't always come up with the right compilation of words to give these seven letters justice. It's just something that is inherent in all of us, something that everyone that has ever walked this earth holds in common. Whether that passion lie in sports or God or music or anything else, I've always been inspired by anyone who could unravel a speech from the heart concerning the importance of that passion in his or her life - whether or not I agree with their opinions. This is why I really enjoy the turning points in war movies where the general pulls the troops together or the coach fires his team up as they go out to face the common enemy.

I often joke with my friends now that my TV is my best friend here in Tupelo. Usually, this gets some laughs but I've also had folks act jealous for some reason. Anyway, I digress. Two things that I've watched in the past few weeks have really caught my attention and stirred emotions within me because of the words and the passion portrayed are John Adams, the HBO miniseries, and Facing the Giants. I was drawn to both of these by my love for sports and our country's history, but they both left me on the edge of my seat waiting for more. (Luckily, there are two more episodes in John Adams to satisfy that thirst.)

In Facing the Giants, a prep football coach is at the end of his proverbial rope. His car has broken down to the point of never starting, his team can't get over the hump of average 3-4 win seasons and he cannot give his wife the family that both want so desperately. Finally, he breaks down and, in a very moving scene, puts everything in God's hands. He even reduces the importance of his team winning on the scoreboard by pressing upon them the importance that they win in life with Jesus in control. "Praise Him when we win, praise Him when we lose" becomes the team's motto. Through the dramatization of film, this powerful message permeates throughout the school, the team wins game after game, a parent buys him a brand new truck...you get the drift.

In John Adams, I don't know why but it's hard not to find reasons to relate to one of the most distinguishable people in our early history. How awesome it would have been to be able to say that, as an actor, you were able to portray people like Abigail Adams, Sam Adams, Ben Franklin, George Washington and Thomas Jefferson. The speeches that these men (and women) gave to match the importance of their words which have stood the test of time...it's really powerful if you allow yourself to get caught up in it.

That's not what this blog is about though...I'm not Roger Ebert or anything. Life only gives you so many moments of reflection, and I don't want to pass up one of those right now. I want the words I choose to write and choose to say to be important. I want people to see my passion for not just sports, not just God, not just movies or Auburn or my country. I want the people in my life to see the passion I have for them, for their friendship and for the paths that our lives have crossed together.

I just hope that I find the right words to say when the opportunities arise.

As always, thanks for reading. War Eagle.

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